We feel okay about posting embarrassing pieces on people we respect and admire for a couple reasons:
1.) The majority of these guys are masters of self-deprecation whose very personas render any attempt at mockery as effective as a tag attempt when you’ve clearly declared “forthfield.” Many of their careers and attendant are made off self-mockery. They laugh at our silly little efforts.
2.) We’ll never be as famous as they are, so there’s little risk of meaningful retribution. Although, in the case of today’s venture, there’s plenty of potential ammunition (see: Bowl-Cut Era, 1985-89).
3.) We only target those who can dish it at least as well as they take it. That means no nonagenarian academics, humorless professional altruists, or dogs.
There. Disclaimer delivered. Now, at the risk of suggesting the influence of a publication defined by fake stories and plaid-clad trust-fund kids misinterpreting irony and heroin chic, let’s get down to making fun of 1980s David Cross:
In this shot, sent to us by a reader, David sports a blood-red, cobweb-plastered vintage velour sweater in a misguided homage to two seminal sci-fi films that defined* his youth: Attack of the Killer Tomatoes and The Giant Spider Invasion. The grin, nestled below coke-bottle glasses, seems to present a less cynical incarnation of the smarm modern-day Cross has come to embody, while the tuft of Jew-fro (no idea if he is Jewish) is receding in a manner that suggests it is not long for this world. Dave’s arrived at the party, he’s wearing his red cobweb sweater, and goddammit, where are the pretzels.
*=unverified. Quite possibly wildly inaccurate.
